DC Drabbles: Headaches
by Ehliena
Summary: Bruce had a lot of things that triggered his headaches. His children and their antics chief among them.


It was late, but not late enough that Batman had to turn in, and Bruce was working at the Batcave's console when he received a message from an unknown sender.

**B, you owe me a new safe house.**

Not many people called him B, if it was League business, they'd call him Batman. If it was Clark, he wouldn't send a message, he'd be there in person, and Clark didn't have safe houses anyway, not on a reporter's salary. Bruce assumed it was one of his proteges.

Dick wouldn't demand outright. He would dance around the issue first and then tell Bruce what happened, why he blamed Bruce enough to ask for a new safe house. Not that Dick would, he had enough money in his trust fund, as well as in his Nightwing funds, not to need to ask for recompensation on a safe house.

Tim woudln't ask. Tim would give Bruce a written report, including the damages done and how much it cost. It was either that or he'd probably siphon off a few hundred thousand dollars and then give Bruce a report about it later if he was currently in a situation where he couldn't inform Bruce right away.

As for Damian, he shared almost all of Batman's safe houses. Although Bruce wouldn't put it past Damian to have a few stashes of Robin paraphernalia elsewhere. He didn't really monitor Damian's spending, he left that job to Alfred. Besides, the boy was definitely more than responsible enough.

That would leave Jason. Bruce was glad that he and Jason have reached a sort-of truce, but he didn't expect their relationship to be as it was prior to Jason's murder. Bruce was certain he had not been involved in an exploding building that night, so he was stumped as to why he would owe Jason a new safe house. But not for long, he was, after all, the World's Greatest Detective.

He was about to investigate when he heard Damian's motorcycle enter the Cave. Usually, Bruce wouldn't turn or greet anyone, but his eyes needed a break from the screen. Seeing Damian proudly displaying a Red Hood helmet told him a lot.

"Hello Father," Damian greeted, not even ashamed or pretending to be ashamed of his prize.

"Damian," Bruce acknowledged, raising his eyebrow at the helmet. "What are you doing with that?"

"It's a prize," Damian explained. "It's between myself and my predecessors. Todd lost, so I took this."

"Does this have something to do with why Red Hood insists that I owe him a new safe house?"

"It was a competition," Damian reasoned, obviously disappointed about the impending reprimand. "He was informed beforehand that I would be doing this."

"That's not the point," Bruce sighed. His son was as stubborn as he was. He wondered how Alfred put up with the both of them. "You destroyed his safe house?"

"It was collateral damage. It should be expected given how Todd fights."

"I do not condone this, Damian," Bruce said. "But if this is something you need to do -"

"It is."

"Then all I ask is that you keep the damage to a minimum," Bruce continued. "And that you don't hurt each other."

"Of course Father," Damian agreed. He only had to steal something from Grayson anyway, and that one would pull punches.

"Good. Go take a shower."

As Damian left, Bruce sighed. His boys would always compete. It started between Dick and Jason, and now it involved them all. Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose to try and stave off the headache that was coming. He'd let his boys deal with it amongst themselves. There were just somethings that Batman couldn't do. He just sent a message to Jason telling the young man that he would pay for the damages Damian had done, but not for the helmet. If he paid for it, it would de-value Damian's prize. And Bruce understood the value of trophies better than most people.

* * *

AN: War of the Robins where Damian issues a challenge to the others. It's so cute, and he's so serious. The reaction of his 'brothers' was so precious. Jason facepalmed, Dick looked upset, and Tim was all 'I'm sick of this shit.' ^.^


End file.
